How Atariology Became the Dominant Religion
From Atariology
By 2500 AD, Atariology is the dominant religion on Earth. The book, 'How Atariology Became the Dominant Religion' (HABDR) describes the events that transpire in order for this to happen. There are 3 volumes of HABDR; the first volume is released in 2012. New editions of each volume of HABDR are released every several years to keep the text consistent with actual events.
HABDR is a satire. Although implausible, it is entertaining to imagine a Universe where Atariology has become the dominant religion. HABDR attempts to create the story of how this could actually happen. The events described in HABDR are generally fiction mixed with actual events. Here, for example, is a brief history of Atariology as described in HABDR.
OCTOBER 23, 2005 - Manifesto Night - 120 Atariology manifestos written in English and French are posted in downtown Geneva, Switzerland. The Manifesto states the beliefs of followers of Atariology.
2007 - The Church of Atariology posts the offical Atariology web-page. JJ Walker, the Founder of Atariology, finances the struggling religion on his own.
October 2009 - JJ Walker gives a series of interviews with Larry King, Jay Leno, and Jimmy Kimmel. In the Jimmy Kimmel interview, JJ Walker appears to have had a spectacularly bad hair day. The embarrassment becomes a source of endless speculation in the tabloids and mimicry on YouTube.
February 2010 - Britney Spears converts to Atariology. Her conversion inspires Madonna to convert from Kabbalah to Atariology as well.
October 2010 - Victoria Beckham converts to Atariology. The web-media sites compare Atariology to Scientology, albeit favorably. The Church of Atariology becomes iconic, controversial, and the new religion of the stars.
June 2010 - Newsweek publishes the first in a series of well-received articles about JJ Walker and Atariology.
December 2010 - Atari sues the Church of Atariology for copyright infringement.
October 2011 - The Church of Atariology publishes the first volume of the New York Times Best-Seller, 'How Atariology Became the Dominant Religion'.
April 2012 - The American-British journalist, Chistopher Hitchens, releases his criticism of Atariology in a book called How Atariology Sold Out.
June 2012 - The Church of Atariology settles with Atari Corporation, and purchases the company in order to develop a perfect simulation.
October 2012 - The Church of Atariology publishes the second volume of 'How Atariology Became the Dominant Religion'.
2015 - The second cold war ends in a grand chess match between Gary Kasparov and a lifelike simulation of Bobby Fischer, developed by the Church of Atariology. The US concedes that Bobby Fischer was indeed a jerk
2020 - 'Release Day' - the 1st of December each year - becomes the first legally recognized Atariology holiday. It celebrates the annual winter birth of new games and game consoles. Arcades become popular again.
2021 - After nearing bankruptcy in pursuit of a perfect simulation, The Church of Atariology finally releases the first 'near'-perfect simulation called 'Bicycle'. The game is a critical hit.
2500 - After numerous splinters, wars, political intrigue, and long bouts of financial uncertainty, the number of members in the Church of Atariology exceeds 3 billion. This number consists of ~40% of the earth's human population (excluding Monsanto-label children). Buddhists, Muslims, and Christians make up the rest of the majority. Hinduism dies out by 2400 AD, thanks to mass conversions of Hindus to a mystical form of Atariology known as 'Karmology'.
